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Kung-Fu Chicken

February 16, 2011

As we speak, Geoff is up in the barn patiently stalking the assassin of one of our Rhode Island Red laying hens. Geoff is not a vengeful man, but he does take flock protection seriously. Very seriously. That is why it is good that he is the main farmer. T’were I the primary farmer in this household, I do not believe I would be stalking the chicken killer from behind the grassy knoll. I, more than likely, would train all of the remaining chickens to shoot little bows and arrows to defend themselves. If they could not figure out how to hold the little bows and arrows then I would teach them Krav Maga or Capoeira or some other cool international form of martial arts.

Click here to find proof that chickens can be trained in kung-fu.


Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Geoff is still sitting in the dark and cold up in the barn waiting for a predator who may or may not come to attack the chickies. I asked him how long he planned to stay up there and he said, “As long as I can stay awake.” As you imagine how Geoff might have said this please remember that Geoff has watched every Western ever and sometimes accidentally talks like John Wayne. It is super cute.

Scooter has taken over the role of man of the house while Geoff is in the barn. So far he has barked ferociously at a child on TV who meowed like a cat. He has also barked at the reflection of light in the windows, the far off sounds of cars on the highway, and a pillow.

As you can see, it is just a typical night at GLR. I hope yours is equally unpredictable.

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